If you blame your life away you are parting with the belief that you can change things for the better yourself, so you might as well give up now. To the contrary, decide that the buck stops here and suddenly you are empowered to really make a difference to your life.

So next time you find yourself blaming someone or something, take back that control. Ask yourself:

-          What could I have done or done better to avoid or at least lesson the outcome?

-          What will I do next time?

-          What could I do now to make the situation better myself?

-          Most importantly, what WILL I do right now?

Now go and do it!!!

As it’s Olympic year, why not set a goal in line with what is likely to be a once in a lifetime experience for most of us? Now obviously I’m not suggesting that if you take up running in February that you will be pushing Paula Radcliffe out of the way on race day (well depends whether or not she remembers her SheWee this time), but trying something different, a sport which you can then follow at the Olympics will bring it alive for you, whilst introducing a bit of variety into your regime.

Here’s your guide to getting a Gold Medal for achievement in 2012:

1. Go to http://www.london2012.com/sport to choose from a list of Olympic sports for you to try your hand at – choose something you have never experienced before (might be worth making sure it’s something you can actually do locally!)
2. Start to follow someone who will be competing in that sport, so that you can really immerse yourself in the world of Olympic training (plus if you ever lose motivation you can get yourself going with the thought that there is someone else having to put a lot more effort in than you!)
3. Set yourself a goal in that sport to achieve by the opening ceremony and make it as real to you as you can – visualise it, imagine yourself telling people about it, and how brilliant it will feel to watch your chosen competitor and to be able to understand a little of what they are going through.
4. Put together a realistic schedule, starting off small, but with plenty of milestones to keep you going, and think of the ultimate reward to give yourself when you’ve achieved it!
5. Now get out there and do it, and enjoy every minute of it, and if you lose motivation keep saying to yourself ‘I’m going for GOLD’!

All joking aside though, a couple of years ago I was asked to write an article on SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and finally the penny dropped. Now for at least 7% of the UK, I know that this is a very serious depressive disorder, but actually if you ask just about anyone they will probably say ‘yes’ to the following SAD checklist:

In winter do you

- find it harder to get up in the morning?

- feel more lethargic?

- crave carbohydrates and sweet food?

- feel like you want to slap Hannah Montana?

Now I’m not a fan of being cold, but research shows that it’s the light we are actually missing. If we don’t get enough of the bright stuff our bodies produce more Melatonin (sleepy hormone) and less Serotonin (happy clappy hormone) =  comfort eating, lifeless, moody bastard.

The thing is that hundreds of years ago most of us worked outside, and when you think how much the upper classes moaned about their love lives in the classics, it makes you think a good day’s work out in the fields would stop Beatrice wondering what Cuthbert’s intentions were (meanwhile he’s deflowering the light infused milkmaid).

Treatment available for SAD sufferers includes light therapy, CBT and as a last resort drugs (the prescriptive sort). For those of you that just feel mild symptoms, check out my own tried and tested action plan:

Wake up to a dawn light

My Lumie dawn light has been a revelation. I bought it in the summer and didn’t think much of it because it got light outside before I had to get up. But since the dark mornings set in I haven’t had to wake up to an alarm once, I just have a really nice stirring feeling when I wake up and see the light on. It’s worth pointing out though that dawn lights are not much good as a SAD light during the day.

Invest in a proper SAD light

This is not something to be a cheapskate about (and this is the angel of thrift talking). I have it on the moment I wake up, and I swear (as does my cynical partner) that it gives an instant lift and makes me feel more energetic. If you’re diagnosed with SAD by your GP you’re exempt from paying VAT on these lights because they are proven to be so effective. Don’t use it before bedtime though as it will prevent you from sleeping. PS. Don’t call it a SAD light, call it a happy light!

Get outside

Sounds simple, but if you work in an office, you may only see a little bit of light through your window, but not actually get outside to see it in its natural state. No matter what your situation, you must get outside, whether it’s in a lunch break, having a meeting walk, or just wrapping up warm and sitting outside of a cafe. If you can bear the cold, expose as much skin as you can so it can soak it up. Gradually reduce the temperature in your home (save money and the planet whilst you’re at it) so that you don’t feel such a big difference when you go outside.

Move it!

Always going to be my first piece of advice to anyone who feels down, but more so in the winter months as getting your body  moving will not only get those lovely endorphins rushing around, but will improve your self esteem and give you more energy. I’m a runner so I tend to exercise outside which is even better, but if you could just prioritise a daily walk you would reap the benefits.

Talk it up

How many times do you say ‘not bad’ when someone asks how you are? Changing your language will make a huge impact on your mood, so take note of your day to day phrases, and tell people ‘I’m really good thanks’ – you will lift them as well, as blues are contagious. Stop complaining about the weather and see the silver lining – if it’s cold call it ‘crisp’, if it’s raining, call it ‘refreshing’ – even if you don’t believe it at first you will be pushing out the negative thoughts that will bring you down.

Eat it up

What you eat affects your mood massively, so avoid going more than three hours without eating which could lead to low blood sugar levels. Swap processed food for foods containing B6 and magnesium such as dark green leafy vegetables, avocados, whole grains such as brown rice, oats and whole-wheat, bananas, un-salted seeds and nuts as these are key nutrients for serotonin production. Drink more water and moderate or cut out alcohol (obvious!). If you’re not already on antidepressants St John’s Wort is a gentle mood booster which prevents the breakdown of serotonin in the body, therefore keeping levels higher.

Oh and if you see or hear Hannah Montana, close your eyes, put your fingers in your ears and shout ‘lalalala’ otherwise she will only exacerbate your irritability.

* Please note that SAD can affect people at any time of year, this piece is focussing on the winter blues version.

With very little ‘me time’ in the diary you may also find yourself in need of a strategy to get you through the season, to make sure it really is jolly:

Say no – sounds a little harsh, but learning to say no at any time of year is important, but at Christmas you will burn yourself out if you don’t prioritise the people and things that deserve the most time (they may not always be screaming the loudest). Saying no to alcohol is probably also a good idea, but let’s be realistic here….

On the booze front, if festive spirit leaves you feeling less than spirited the next morning, learn to have a pint of water to every alcoholic drink (if you’re mean spirited make sure you’re paying for the water round!) This not only dilutes the alcohol in your body causing less damage, but it will also prevent you from getting so dehydrated which is the main reason for the hellish wakeup call the next morning. This should also help you to pace yourself so that you enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling of being tipsy rather than the ‘I love you Dave from accounts, and I want your babies’ behaviour.

If exercising is just something that you can’t possibly fit in (although I would seriously contest that of course!) fit walking in whenever you can so that you are burning more calories throughout the day, rather than trying to fit in an hour’s gym session. Whoever said meetings had to be held whilst sitting down in a boring room? Have walking meetings and you will find that ideas will flow and the mood will be lifted. Rather than meeting friends down the pub, go for a walk with them – if you end up in the pub so be it, but it’s better than just settling in with a pint for the night.

Keep as regular sleep pattern as you can. You don’t have to be the last one standing at the Christmas party – there are no awards in the office for this, no matter how good a dancer you are (really?) – besides anyone left at that time wouldn’t remember  you were there anyway! Give yourself a curfew when it comes to meeting friends and let them know beforehand that you will be leaving at a particular time. This will prevent burnout by the big day.

Keep your blood sugars level by eating little and often. Do not leave it more than 3 hours to eat at least 100 good calories that include healthy, low GI carbs. This will keep your energy levels tip top and make it easier not to reach for evil mince pies.

Anyway, the reason for this blog is not to vent my anti-smoking views, but to complain about the latest phenomena in ‘healthy’ mattresses (as has been sold to me by the incredible marketing strategy) known as the Memory Foam mattress. Apparently it’s great for your back, your posture and general wellbeing – is it heck! Deceptively, when you lie on one in the shop it feels like heaven as a perfectly me shaped dip forms, fooling me into thinking I will never want to leave my bed again as it cradles me in it’s nest. Try spending a night on one though and I find myself dreaming about being stuck in quicksand, and I wake up sweating as I try to climb out of the ever deepening hole my seemingly heavy butt has created. The morning turns into a living nightmare though as I hoist myself out of bed and my perfectly good back has aged 70 years, so I find myself groaning when simply putting on my socks.

I’m sorry for those of you who swear by them, but I no longer believe in memory foam, which to me is just cheap foam that happens to reform when there’s no weight on it. I am now sleeping soundly on the floor, as my memory foam mattress enjoys the comfort of my 4 poster bed – but I will get my own back when my pocket sprung mattress arrives the MF will be out on it’s saggy…..

A. I no longer have to squint at my emails when on the run as my iPhone becomes second best. Good for my eye health.
B. I had become used to the annoyingly small screen on my iPhone when searching the Internet, but I am sure it didn’t do my stress levels any good. Good for my wellbeing.
C. My ‘exercise anywhere’ mantra has led me to fill my iPhone with exercise classes so that even when I am abroad with work (as I travel a lot) I am still able to stick to my routine. Ok so my iPad feels a little hard done by that it’s now full of yoga, pilates and Davina McCall instead of cool stuff, but hey, my butt is firmer for it, and now I’ll be even more motivated to kick box at home as it involves using my new toy. Good for my fitness.
D. It is also the first time in my life I have ever had something that is cool now (as opposed to having the iPhone 1 when the 5th model is due out). Good for my self esteem – I actually don’t care, but my husband is a bit miffed I got one before him which is fun!

I’m not so naive to think that ‘gamers’ are going to read this and think, brilliant I can invite my mates round for a Zumba class in my bedroom now, but for anyone who does care, working out to a video on your iPad in the gym is cool!

(Apologies for the delay of this post – I have been stranded in Spain with no wifi – shock horror!)

Another year and another Vitality Show is over and I must say it was my favourite so far. I was with the very fun team on the Women’s Running magazine stand, and we really enjoyed meeting our readers and hearing their stories – most inspiring. As much as I loved the show, it always amazes me when these exhibitions, dedicated to health and fitness give space to the enemy…check out this massive cake stand (like we need reminding what we’re missing out on!). Now don’t get me wrong, I love to have my cake and eat it, but it just feels wrong when people are doing yoga next to you!

Getting within a metre of Mr Motivator made up for it though (couldn’t get closer for the hordes of women swooning over him – hence the rubbish picture – that and not wanting to look too much like a fan!). Seriously though, has the guy been cryogenically frozen, he still looks as fresh as the bandana clad daisy that used to adorn my morning TV whilst getting ready for school!

Every year I’ve been to the Vitality Show I’ve seen Joanna Hall (who just seems to ooze energy) buzzing around. Although I knew she promoted walking as a way of getting fit, which happens to be one of my favourite past-times, but until speaking to her and ‘Brighton Ange’ I hadn’t realised that she actually teaches people ‘how’ to walk properly, so I’m looking forward to going on her walking spa weekend to improve my style!

Lowlight of the show was having an eye cream applied which was supposed to straighten out my eye wrinkles, but ended up looking like some crusty erm…. after half an hour! I also can’t write this post without mentioning the lady I saw sneezing on a stand dedicated to immune system supplements, which made me giggle to myself.

The highlight of the show though was meeting two readers on the Women’s Running stand, Janine Murphy and Joan Moxham. These women are keen runners and nothing has ever inspired me to keep it up as much as them when they told me they were both 73 – seriously, they must be taking what Mr Motivator takes because they looked in their early 60′s. They also only started running in theor 50′s, which goes to show it’s never too late.

What did I take away with me? Well quite a lot this year, a kegel (post to come), a meeting with the Balance Master (who told me off for slouching) which I’m really looking forward to, and a SAD light, which is awesome, and does really seem to energise me! I also came away with the question, how many people come to the show for free stuff, rather than an injection of vitality?!

The worst part is that suddenly you’re scared that you will wake up fat one morning. You don’t want to hear people telling you how good you look because you are worried you can’t sustain the weight loss, and the pressure is just too much. You feel like you’ve lost all sense of control which just encourages you to reach for….more cake.

So how do you lose the last few pounds? Well the truth of it is that you probably don’t need to and it’s your body’s way of telling you this, but you don’t want to hear that, and I’m all for striving for personal goals as long as they are healthy and realistic. The first thing you need is to break that mental cycle you’ve entered of being scared of food, but cannot think of anything else. The likelihood is that you have forgotten what the carrot was in the first place, so it’s probably time to remind yourself of why you wanted to drop a couple of sizes. Was it to kick ass at your ex’s wedding, kick ass at your own wedding, or just have a kissable ass in those skinny jeans you bought on impulse 5 years ago that you have never managed to squeeze into. Give yourself a break and focus on maintaining the weight for at least a month, this way you won’t be restricting yourself so harshly, both physically and mentally and you can allow your metabolism some time to behave itself. You will stop being scared that you will grow an extra muffin top in your sleep and stop dreaming about eating muffins or anything that might have some kind of carbohydrate content at every waking moment. Concentrate on exercising, and up the amount you are doing – this new focus will help you to feel good about yourself and tame the insanity that has crept in. Then when you’re feeling ready again you can crack on with losing the final few pounds – if by then you actually believe you need to!